Full Bloom: Too Many Hazards

Full of blooming screens!

I once introduced a friend to Mille Bornes by stating the objectives as 1) get as many miles as you can, and 2) stop your opponents from traveling. He got it really good. In four moves all of us were stopped. Including my friend who had (of course) raised the vengeance of us all.

Full Bloom is a Facebook game that reminds me of that friend. Obviously someone told them that the game is merely a draw, so they throw up as many screens as possible before you get to the actual playing board: invite friends, play a special pre-game, get a gift, give gifts, find a special butterfly, and a news screen. If that isn't enough, when you get to your "garden" there's a big yellow arrow pointing to the news button. Then, you can click on the game button to go to the playing board.

Full Bloom also sucks up CPU usage. I know because I've played it on a Windows laptop and had warnings. It's a simple little match-three game with no need for tons of CPU. So, what's it doing with the CPU? Is it just lazy programing? Or perhaps malicious surreptitious tracking? Could it possibly be checking my hard drive?

The game itself is nicely made: pretty, logical, levels up in small increments, adds interesting hazards. Too bad it's all larded up with crap that makes it frustrating to begin playing. Also, the add-ons are outrageously expensive. It's about $1.00 to add on 5 moves in the middle of a game (if you run out of moves or time). Other options are equally expensive. Really silly when you consider that you could buy a "real" game with endless playing time and unlimited moves for $10.

I like the game. In spite of the detractors I play it a lot. I've never paid to play and I never will. It's not worth it.

One of three pre-screens to click through before you
get to play the game.

You arrive here after the preliminary screens.
After this you can go to the playing board.

After the garden, on the way to the playing
board - a little detour.

Sky 227 - dark glow

What's wrong with socialized medicine?

Socialized medicine is not socialism. Socializing medicine seems to be the magic bullet that will fix all our health care ills. The reality is far from the dream. According to my experience, anyway. I've twice been the victim of socialized medicine. Okay. Victim is too strong a word. Let's leave that for now.

My first experience with socialized medicine was in England where I gave birth to my second child. You can't go by pregnancy and birth because they can't wait. Not like gall stones, hairlips or bone spurs which can be put off for a very long time indeed. As a pregnant person I received priority treatment. My then mother-in-law with gall stones ended up on an 18 month waiting list and was only bumped to the head of the line after 7 months because the only thing she had been able to keep down for weeks was warm water.

Some people think that socialized medicine is good because the poor will have the health care they need. In my English situation I lived in what we in America consider to be an upper middle class neighborhood. So did my mother-in-law. We weren't poor or needy by any stretch. What happens is that patients flood the system without a comparable increase in doctors. The doctors and hospitals get overloaded.

Those with discretionary income who can pay for private care can jump to the head of the line. And we're back to where we started. The poor and those who can't afford the premium prices of private doctors, including professional couples with children, are put on hold for just about everything but emergencies. They are seen by overworked doctors and end up in thinly staffed hospitals.

This is much like my experience now. I am unemployed and have qualified for free local health insurance offered by Virginia Commonwealth University's Medical College of Virginia. The program is also know as VCC (or Virginia Coordinated Care). My coverage is much like an HMO. I have a primary care physician and can't see a specialist without a referral. For emergencies I can only go to the Medical College of Virginia hospital (MCV).

The emergencies work out fine. Socialized medicine is set up for emergencies and other priority conditions. Of course, I still sit for hours with all kinds of people, although MCV has a special streamlined system (two hours instead of four) for those who are "in-and-out" patients.

On the other hand, it took six months for me to get to a Urologist and two months to get my first doctor's appointment. Originally the Urologist had scheduled my appointment for a year out, but my doctor and the patient advocate managed to pull some strings to get my wait time shortened. Getting a taste of this? Good.

As well as quantity, quality also suffers. Since doctors are in such demand you get all kinds of doctors. Urologists who cause off-the-charts pain with a q-tip. Doctors who can't get your blood pressure medication right or who refrain from referring you to a specialist for any number of reasons — one of which may be that the system requires they exhaust certain options before referring. Another may be that they are just too overworked to keep up with any patient who isn't teetering on the brink of emergency.

It would be great to provide some kind of health care either permanently or temporarily for those who can't afford to pay. I don't know what that looks like. It doesn't look like anything I've seen or heard about so far. Whatever system is created, the patient should bear some financial responsibility, no matter how small. And there needs to be enough doctors and hospitals to go around.

How will that be paid for? I don't have an answer. Right now the American system is being stretched to the limit with record unemployment and the boomer retirement bombshell. Can we afford socialized medicine? Can we afford to not have socialized medicine, keeping in mind that prevention is a lot cheaper than treatment?

I hope a workable a solution can be found. I hope everyone who is able and willing helps find a solution in a peaceful, fact-finding, respectful way. Best of luck to those working on this problem.
Current Fads
Listening. Somebody Like You, Silver Screen Soundtrack Orchestra; susurration of Air Conditioner
Watching. The Fifth Element (1997)
Activity. learning how to navigate free health care; dealing with 10 months of unemployment
Gadget. resuscitated Palm Zire 31
News Source. the news feeds in Safari
Reading. Fruits of the Poisonous Tree - Archer Mayor; First Impressions: What You Don't Know About How Others See You - Ann Demarais and Valerie White; facebook and twitter updates; Garage Band help
Writing. this blog post; morning pages

Throw Bags at It

Today I discovered why I don't like WalMart. I have often complained of the shoddy service, lackadaisical attitude of the workers and been shocked by reports of the WalMart corporation's insensitivity to their employees needs. All this has kept me away from WalMart for years.

Today I went to WalMart for a prescription because it was cheap. The same prescription available at CVS for $22.50 and at Walgreen for $9.99 I purchased today for $4.00.

There was no extra expense in checking out the prices at CVS or Walgreen. Both are within minutes of my home and I drop in fairly regularly. So, the trip to WalMart was made worth my while as I used the restroom and bought groceries while waiting 30 minutes for my prescription to be filled.

I had to stop the checkout person from putting my five items into three bags. Well, four if you count the package of Charmin toilet paper rolls. And I do. I told the checkout person clearly, in English, not to double bag my stuff. It was already double bagged when I mentioned this. She then proceeded to grab an additional bag. No, I repeated. Just one bag, please. I unwrapped the egg carton from a separate bag and placed it in the now single bag. Then she asked if I wanted to have a bag for my tp. No. I mean, really. It's already bagged in strong plastic. No point in adding a layer. It's not like I'm going to sail it over the ocean or anything.

Next I walked over to pharmacy to pick up my prescription. The clerk, noticing my tp, asked if she should ring up my "tissue." I explained I had already paid for it. She put my prescription, already in a paper bag, into another bag. I got my receipt out of that bag and then put the prescription in the one plastic bag with my other items and returned the small bag to her. Did I want a bag for my tissue? No, I said, fewer bags, not more. (To make matters worse, the prescription itself comes in a plastic container – a single use, hard case, plastic container. What could be more wasteful?)

So, apparently, throw a bag at it is the WalMart way of offering customer service. I broke all the rules by not taking as many bags as I could possibly grab. To punish me, the greeter at the door asked me to prove I had paid for the tissue by showing my receipt. Uh huh. Right. Next I'll be walking out of WalMart with couches, desks and computers I haven't paid for. As my parting shot, I threw over my shoulder at the security/greeter, "I might have more stuff in my bag that you don't know about." That wiped the smirk off her face.

Anyway, back to why I don't like WalMart. It's the same reason I don't like any large department, mass media, big box store. I get treated like a number and not just a number but a sort of egg that has to fit in a predesigned little box just like all the other eggs. There are massive assumptions in all their gestures: I like and need bags, I can't be trusted, I'm just like everyone else.

This is why I prefer, say, Ellwood Thompson to Kroger. No one at Ellwood Thompson has ever treated me like a number. I am always an unknown quantity to be coddled, asked about preferences and treated as if each visit were the first. And no one throws bags at me.

Elaine Unemployed - Day 6 of 24

No vid today! It's Saturday, after all.

I applied for three jobs today. One of which I found by perusing the Fortune "They're Hiring" site. Each and every company I applied to had their own application system where you have to create a user name, profile, resume and cover letter. The worst ever award goes to Hilton. I'll be amazed if they get more than my job application. It's just ridiculous how many things you have to click on to create an emailable application. Many of the items are hard to see or find, need specific coding which requires using a search function that doesn't always work or with unclear instructions, or are difficult to edit. I'm going to be generous and assume that this is all in the name of cutting down applications from thousands to hundreds. Oh, and then there's my favorite: system requirements. One of application systems had the attitude that if you must be on a Mac we will support you only if you use Firefox. When I see this it tells that they want to know more about me than I'm willing to share. In other words, they are using invasive programming in their application which, among other things, will get my cookies – a function Safari doesn't allow.

But, whatever. If the current climate demands everyone bend over and wait for it to apply for a job then I guess that's what I'll have to do.

Yesterday was quite depressing when I heard the news on NPR about how lousy the job market is right now. The announcer said that in a regular economy this would be bad news but in this economy it's good. And then they went on to describe yet more layoff statistics in yet more industries. That was a real pick-me-up. ha ha

Basically, as a country, we're f--ked. I derive absolutely no consolation from knowing that as the US goes, the world goes. How can this be good for anyone anywhere?

I wish I had sold my house after my first lay off in 2007 and used the money from that and the severance package to take an around-the-world trip. Yeah, I'd be flat broke right now but at least I would have something to show for it.

pound cake and hot water

Fifteen dollars for a slice of pound cake and a cup of hot water. Would you do that? Me either but I did. I actually thought I would be getting a real breakfast. I suppose the old guard think fifteen dollars quite generous for the privilege of sitting at their elbows. Yes, I was surrounded by mostly old guys in suits. All I could think was, "Fifteen dollars for this?" Before that, I had to get out of bed early and be in town by the barely respectable time of 7:30 a.m. Why did I do that? For an inside chat with MWV and a bit of a discussion on their rebranding at the 1708 Gallery. Because it was sponsored by C3 and I expected something a bit edgy. Nope. Standard PowerPoint exhibiting all mistakes of your basic slide show (too many words, rehash of the speakers content, few images). That's the last time I pay for the honor of sitting in a recreational board room listening to someone spew corporate speak and talk about reaching the little people on the front lines.

As I sat there I wondered where all the vital young people were, the ones who are shaking it up, the ones making things happen. Making things happen elsewhere, obviously. This was old news no one wanted to hear. Most of those present had been involved in the rebranding or were business associates of those involved. What was the point?

I did learn two things. One, the "tried and true" method of rebranding has been inextricably married to organizational development. Two, the market has changed on a global scale and you'd better get on the bus. MWV has just managed to catch that bus.

FIA CARD SERVICES ARE UNFAIR MONEY GOUGERS!

Get this! I made a payment in November that was one day late, over the phone. The person who took my payment assured me I would not be charged a late fee since the payment was due on a Sunday and I was paying on a Monday. Contrary to electronic wisdom, mail payments are still received and I am sure that if a payment is due Sunday (when the postal service does not deliver) and received on Monday it is not counted late (as was the custom in the good old days).

Since I am moving toward total electronic living, I get my statement online (saving trees, I hope). I didn't look at my November or December statements and made the standard payment through my bank's electronic system. However, the company did charge me a late fee in November thus making my December payment $3.00 short. Yes. Three dollars. What did FIA Card Services do? Did I get a friendly email advising me my payment was short? Did I get a nice phone call from a friendly employee? No. They charged me a $39.00 late fee and raised my interest rate to 27.99%. UN-BLOODY-BUH-LEEVABLE!!!

I am now in the process of closing the account by paying off the total amount. So, good bye FIA Card! My new loan will be at 5.47% and my card will be paid off in three years.

For those of you interested, I have been with this same card, administered by FIA Card, for over six years. I make regular payments. Although I have been late only twice (really!), I have also made extra and large payments. The amount I owe is less than half of my credit limit. Yet for three friggin' dollars they sell me up the creek.

By the way, I've always wondered about the wisdom that says, "Since you can't pay us we're going to ask you to pay us more by raising your interest rate."

I'm Back!!!

Woo hoo! Happy Dance! I gave up on Verizon and adopted Clearwire. And guess what? Clearwire really works! And it's faster than Verizon! and it's cheaper! Nyah! Nyah! Nyah!

Is that great dialogue or what? Oh? It's a monologue? Why do I care? I have joined in for the annual madness known as Script Frenzy. This year I will be writing a screenplay even though I had a choice of TV script, stage play and screenplay. I am now the proud author of 1.5 screenplays. Which is great? Right? Wish me luck.

Better yet. You do it, too. We need more stories.

damn the phone company -i'll be back

Due to forces of nature and the lousy customer service of Verizon (it's either up and wonderful or never coming back, there is not in between), I have been without internet since Saturday night. I've been borrowing access to do the essentials. At the moment I'm at the library with 18 minutes remaining on my time at this terminal. When I get more time I'll tell you just how insane Verizon is. They have not kept two appointments. Well, gotta run. Wish me luck

Blue Screen of Death - Coming to an Apple Near You

The Apple I used to know and love was a friendly, happy company – the lovable big guy on the block who would take on all comers and put flowers in their gun barrels. The guy to whom you could go to with all your problems and who would say, "No problem! I've got that covered." He was a welcoming dude with a living room as large as however many people wanted to jump into it. Those days are over.

I understand, somewhat, that an iPhone software upgrade broke the hacks that opened the phone (well, transportable mini-super computer, actually) to extreme litigation by the people we used to call Ma Bell. Hacking and breaking are, after all, illegal and hobbies akin to stealing. I'm all for paying people for the work they do.

I understand also that if you want to make really cool software that runs happily on Mac OS you need to make a fianacial contribution and join the club. If I had put a lot of time and effort into making a really efficient system with features that border on AI, I'd want anyone who wanted to mess with it to show some commitment, too.

iPhone users got their warning. iMac users didn't. Or if they did it was only in media that doesn't get to me.

Last night I watched a DVD on my brand new iMac running Jaguar. When I was finished I shut down the system and went to bed. This morning I started it up and launched Safari. Or tried to. Safari wouldn't launch. I launched Firefox. Okay. I have Firefox up and running. So, what's up with Safari?

I ran the Update Software utility. Three updates were waiting for me. I installed them. The updates required restart. I restarted. Voila! Blue screen of death (although it's a much nicer blue than the dozy one) followed by the Welcome Screen. Like, where has all my personal information gone? No problem. I enter it all again, click continue and I'm back at the Welcome Screen. After about five retries (yes, I am persistent) I give up and call Apple. It's too early for California – they're all still in bed (ty 1-800-MYAPPLE).

Fortunately, I still have my old (non-Intel) G4 and can look up solutions on the Apple website. I try the least destructive solution: removing ApplicationEnhancer.bundle and it doesn't work. The next solution jumps way back to 1995 with what we used to call a "Clean Install" of the system. That's what I'm doing right now and have been doing for over an hour.

Dear Mr. Jobs, please send a warning next time you want to boot out my system enhancers (of which I have none – is this an Apple vs. Adobe thing? Do you have a bee in your bonnet about Tasty Aps?) and rob me of 2 hours of production time. I'm happy to remove substandard items from my machine or at least to set aside needed time to fix something. I'm not happy with this new bully on the street. Put him away, please.

Normally I would not be writing this sort of thing but I've watered the plants, fed the dog, swept the floors and there is still time left over to be angry about having to reinstall my system. Fortunately, I've been using Time Machine. The most I will lose is one day. Yes, I did consider restoring the system with Time Machine, but that option removes everything on the hard drive. Theoretically I would get it all back in the restore but, no, thank you. I've been there and done that. There's always some little nit that I dearly loved which turns out to be irreparably damaged or gone AWOL.

Argggh!! Well, now I have time to take a shower and get dressed. And take the dog for a walk ... and watch the sun rise over the neighborhood ... and ...

Unlock Books!

Free the books! Freedom for readers! Why don't they just chain us in underground cells and read the books to us then they can make absolutely certain no one is making copies!!!

I recently purchased an electronic book in PDF format from Fictionwise. Before I could actually download the book, I had to click through three screens warning me that I was buying an Acrobat PDF and Fictionwise wasn't responsible if I was unable to read it. Very dire warnings indeed. What was all the insanity about? I've bought PDF books before and read them without problem, even the "locked" PDFs. I make PDFs all the time whether at work or not. So, I bought the PDF with intent to make a copy for my Palm Zire PDA so I could read it in comfort. What book did I buy? Terry Pratchett's Reaper Man. Yes, I 'm a big fan. Although I didn't start off reading his 50 books in order, I am now.

Okay. I download the book but it's not a PDF. It's this weird .etd format. I double click on it, Acrobat Professional opens and I get an error. Can't open the book. I go to the Adobe site and spend about 30 minutes in an endless loop between two pages on the Digital Editions web: the download page and the help page. Back and forth. Back and forth.

I paid over a thousand dollars for Adobe CS 3 Suite (of which Acrobat Professional is a part). I figure that if I call them they will help me out here. No such luck. I need to talk to the Digital Editions people. (Or person. I think it's just one guy who fiddles around on his lunch break.) Anyway, I call them and they transfer me to the Acrobat people who tell me I need to talk to the Digital Editions people. Another endless loop. In desperation I send an email the the Digital Editions people thinking it will be days before I hear anything.

Meanwhile Reaper Man languishes unread and starts to burn a hole in my brain because I picked up the next book in the series as a paperback while out one day, knowing how fast I get through Terry Pratchett books and wanting to have another waiting for me when I finish Reaper Man.

Surprise me! About 24 hours later, I get an email from a very nice guy at Adobe Digital Editions (back from lunch, I suppose) who takes about three emails figuring out my problem and telling me the solution. My Apple computer is too new. They don't make Digital Editions for it yet. Would I like to know when it's available. Yes, please, I tell him.

Meanwhile, back on my old G4 I get the hint and download Digital Editions easily although launching it requires returning to the Digital Editions web site. Quirky or what? The book opens and, hooray!!! I can now read my book but only on that G4 and only when it's connected to the internet. OMG!!

No wonder Amazon has come out with the Kindle and Fictionwise sells their own formats as do the Palm people, not to mention the MSN Reader (snappy title, eh?). Adobe has alienated the customers they created by making it nearly impossible to use the PDFs that are purchased.

Sad really. Adobe originated digital documents and now they're going to lose them. Next time I buy an e-book it won't be an Adobe PDF.

Current Fads
Listening. Night of the Furies - The Rosebuds and recent purchases (unpublished); heavy rain
Watching. Blade Runner (year)
Activity. learning yoga; back exercises
Gadget. cell phone
News Source. the news feeds in Safari
Reading. Nerd Girl Rocks Paradise City - Anne Soffee; Poltergeist - Kat Richardson; First Impressions: What you don't know about how others see you - Anne Demarais and Valerie White; The Marshall Plan for Getting Your Novel Published - Evan Marshall; Mensa Bulletin; Popular Science (Yes, I really am reading them all right now—I'm a reading addict. What can I say?)

a new level of smooth in tv entertainment

ABC is back on my entertainment list with a player that really works. Unfortunately it is some type of proprietary player that wraps up Quicktime in a box of commercial ads. I had to download a browser plug-in which took about two minutes and automatically recognized me as a "Mac People." After the install confirmation I was seamlessly returned to the show I had chosen. Pretty neat.

The show played smoothly (except for that two minutes of smeary visuals) in high resolution. The ads play really huge (of course). Your days of opting out of commercials are numbered. Fortunately they can still be muted and there aren't as many of them as on "free" tv.

I watched two episodes of "Samantha Who?". I guess that means I liked it. I enjoyed seeing Christina Applegate in a new role that suits her. She was perky, believable and, well, smooth. I liked the writing, the dialogue is good, the costumes and make up are shinier than a new penny. The plot is entertaining in a "die hard" sort of way. There's a lot of action and one must suspend a fair amount of disbelief. One must also be enamored of formula and the amazing sheen of polish. I am reminded of the 50's as in "Father Knows Best" and "Leave it to Beaver." Gloss. Very glossy.

Back to real life.

I'm free!

Yep. Free as a bird and little more expensive to maintain. I've been RIFfed. I feel great. It's like a whole new world has opened up for me. Starting over ... it'll be just like ...
Current Fads
Listening. Recent Purchases on iTunes; faked white noise that sounds like whooshing
Watching. Bombay Talkie (1970)
Activity. dreaming
Gadget. cell phone
News Source. the news feeds in Safari
Reading. The Runes of the Earth - Stephen R. Donaldson; Severence Package - SunTrust; GD USA; MacWorld; AdWeekly (Yes, I really am reading them all right now—I'm a reading addict. What can I say?)

Hello Cleveland

Amazingly, here's a school (SucessTech) with a plan in place that worked. A city with a responsive police force that actually responded quickly. Yet on CBS they badged the Superintendent of Schools to death about security measures. You can't stop up all the loop holes. And you can't stop someone from finding them.

Another story on TV this morning was about crash test dummies and SUVs. Just another way to protect us from each other because we are imprecise and don't always pay attention.

Let's take all that crash test money and engineering development money and all the money for hiring more security and the money for making better bombs and the money for better jails. Let's take it all and put into something worthwhile, like figuring out what makes a good, attentive, alert, precise, well-adjusted and healthy human being and let's make as many of those as we can. Let's put any money left over after that into helping the rest become better. Let's find out what it takes, whatever it is — whether it's physiology, or psychology or critical development periods or whatever. Let's find out what it takes and let's do it. Oh, and along the way, let's talk to the kids. The kids know.

Spending more money and time on security is like putting us all in jails. And even there we won't be safe.

My iTunes Purchases

Wow! This is a great widget! Forgot to mention you can choose from three sizes and five color schemes. Love this one. I hope you will, too!

If I had to define my taste, I'd say "eclectic." And you?

My iTunes

Here's a nifty widget from Apple that shows you my iTunes favorites. It seems to be a list of the music I play or have played at least once using iTunes on my machine. Some of the names in small type don't look familiar to me, but I have a lot of tunes. The big, bold names are really the ones I play most often so if you want to know what I like, check those names. I thought I played U2 more often than the size of its name shows, but I realize now that I play them a lot in the car, and that's not reflected in this widget.

Downside? I had to partially break my privacy with the iTunes Store to do this. I had to agree to let Apple access my account but just for this widget. I don't know. I feel a bit squidgey about that but, obviously, not too much to not do it. Anyway, this is a trial. If it works then I'll be making this a regular feature. Let me me know if it makes my page way too long to load.

I'll be testing it myself this weekend when I shut down my machine. We'll see how it works then.

Nice blogger swag, btw.

impeach bush

Yesterday I visited In Other Words for the first time in days and read Viggo Mortensen's rant about Bush. Considering the other fine speeches Mr. Mortensen has made, the rant was uncharacteristically blunt and in ALL CAPS. I presume Mr. Mortensen has been around the net long enough to be fully aware of the conventions.

At the bottom of his tirade was a list of links for those interested in supporting the impeachment of President Bush. (Dick Cheney definitely needs impeaching, too, but I think the sanity squad will be rounding him up long before then.)

Here's the petition to impeach Bush. I signed it. You can, too! (Although, I don't think Belgians can. But you never know. Give it a whack.)

Extra: Perceval Press is giving away a book (you pay postage) to support the cause. Order yours now!

Twilight of Empire is ultimately an unflinching look at the corporate greed and manipulation at the bottom of what may be the most bungled foreign policy project in United States history. With the bodies piling up and no success in sight, Americans can no longer and sit idly by while their elected (and unelected) leaders gamble their future away.

(quoted from Perceval Press)

very very very hard

Just got back from having my picture taken for the Style Weekly article about Script Frenzy that's coming out next week. The photographer took a lot of shots. I hope he got at least one that's not too horrible and doesn't show my batwings. :::sigh::: I am so envious of famous people who can be so nonchalant about the whole thing.

I know that I'm not a square as long as they're not around
but I find it very, very, very, very, very, very hard —Paul McCartney

Song of the Day: Feet in the Clouds

Why I Love Bing

No, not Bing Crosby, Stanley Bing. That man with the best bull sh** job in the universe. He is a brand and a product. How much better could it be?

Here's just one example of why I love Bing. And, the chart shows why Bing is needed most of all on Friday afternoons.

Another is the sanctity he bestows on all bloggers. I'm ready for that huge book advance ...

bottom fishing

While trolling the networks for entertainment during my dinner break some days ago (and hearing experience shout "it'll never happen!"), I came across a segment of an "entertainment news" show that promised exclusive video of David Hasselhof in supreme debauchery. Staying tuned, I saw lovely photos of David in his Knight Rider and Baywatch days and other photos of him with his lovely family. Then a blurry, washed-out image filled the screen showing a paunchy man reclining on the floor surrounded by wrappers. Apparently he was eating something. The wrappers were empty or only holding food-specked cartons. There was no actual food that I could see, but that may have been because the video was lousy and the bright whites washed out the detail. Whatever.

This fat man moved his jaws and waggled distended cheeks. He wasn't totally fat, just paunchy like any self-respecting middle-aged man. He looked slightly woozy. He couldn't be bothered to answer the insistent questions of a child who apparently was holding the camera. He snorffled and snuffled as he repeatedly crammed his hands into his mouth. In the background was something that looked suspiciously like a beer bottle, although the label was turned so it could have been root beer. There was no condensation on the bottle (blurred out maybe). The contents, if there were any, were room temperature.

The "newscasters" came back into the picture deploring the ugly sight, expressing sympathy for poor David and acting as if he were doing something repulsive and quite possibly criminal. It was just a drunk man eating. How bad could it be? I've heard of messy divorces but I think they've taken it to brand new lows in California.

In my more lurid days during high school, I read the weird case of some psychologist's patient who could get very pregnant in a matter of hours. After some research he discovered she could consume about three grocery bags of food in a really short period of time and that this accounted for her distended belly. He gave her his brilliant analysis describing the complex psychological reasons why she did this to herself. She sighed in relief, miraculously recovered and lived happily ever after. uh huh. Nevertheless, I was impressed by her physical acrobatics. How the heck did she do that?

Mr. Hasselhof undoubtedly fits the category of acrobat as do many thespians. Acting is a very strenuous job. My guess is his first addiction is food and that alcohol just removes the barriers to gluttonous inhaling. I suspect these bouts are followed by periods of starvation and over exercising to get the physique he needs to keep working. Yes – that's sick.

While on the plane recently (and again desperate for entertainment) I watched a two hour condensed version of what the media considers news. At the end of this was a bite of fashion news showing a runway filled with models. Have you ever seen a widescreen movie shown wrong? It looks a bit like an El Greco painting, the figures pulled out of shape like images on silly putty. I thought for a second that there must be some technical difficulty and then realized that, no, this is how those women look. The baggy clothes did not help.

The real reason I've quit watching TV and most movies is that I'm tired of looking at food-crazed, half-starved psyches trapped in malnourished bodies. I get nauseated from seeing bones sticking out of places where flesh should be. I gawk with disbelief at the transparent efforts to cloak skeletal remains in loose attire. I can't keep my mind on the plot from wondering how they keep going from day to day and what they must be telling themselves and each other to keep it up. People are starving in Mexico and they refuse to eat in the land of plenty.

It's almost enough for me start a list of shows that have normal-sized bodies in them. Almost.